Weight will always be an issue

I’ve somehow managed to gain 8 pounds in a month and 3 of those last week alone.  And I have no idea why.  I’ve been exercising almost every day and I expected some of the weight gain to be from muscle build up.  At least, that’s what the guy in the exercise video told me.  I haven’t been eating anything extreme (no binging for once).  I thought I was doing really well since the start of the year, but I can’t seem to lose anything.  I’m almost at my highest weight and I feel awful.  Nothing fits, I’m embarrassed to be seen in public and I know the Boy has noticed.  No wonder he doesn’t want to hang out anymore.  I’ve switched back to 40 minute walking/jogging so maybe that will help.  I achieved my lowest adult weight when I walked/jogged for 45 mins/2.5 miles every day.  I got sick of it, but worked.  Hopefully it work again.  I’m so sick of being fat.  I’ve been trying to lose for years, but it doesn’t go anywhere.  I’ve also started logging my food.  They say just writing what you eat down helps you lose weight, but really I just don’t eat when I want to because I’m too lazy to log in and write it down.  The “calories over” number also depresses me.  There’s no way I can function on 1200 calories a day.

I don’t expect to ever be “thin” but not having back fat bounce around when I walk would be great.

Current stats: 5’7″, 168 lbs for anyone who cares.


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