A Stable Day Today


I don’t get to say that often. I was still a bit strung out from the typical social anxiety stuff (I still have the physical reaction when walking out of my office, and I know I said something stupid/incoherent when a coworker popped into my office to ask me a totally random question).  But I did feel kind of happy in between.  I was enjoying music again, and didn’t even mind the hour drive home in traffic, leaving work 1.5 hours later than usual.  I got to see some of the lunar eclipse live (thanks google)  and I went for a walk with The Boy this afternoon.

We talked about pretty typical stuff, mostly about work.  I don’t really like to talk about anything too personal or get flirty during work hours.   It throws me off and I really didn’t want to lose focus for the day.  It wasn’t that I was holding back anything, but it was relaxing and I felt comfortable with him again. If could spend more time with him after work, I probably would not want to see him on campus.  Obviously our relationship has grown from , “oh hi, we eat at the same group lunch everyday” to “oh hi, I’m on your couch at 12:30 on a sunday night”.  I feel weird mixing real friends with work friends.  I’m never sure what’s appropriate or the proper behavior.  This is made infinitely worse given my attraction to him.

Anyway, here’s to an ok kind of day.  I’m thinking a decent night sleep helped to.  I’ve learned that NOT going on the computer while in bed makes for a more effective sleep.  Even if it’s only 6 hours…

It wasn’t that I was holding back anything, but it was relaxing and I felt comfortable with him again.

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